Morality Play at Midnight

(which sounds like one of those paperback mysteries that generally rely on puns or onomatopoeia to attract readers, like a light attracts bugs)

A couple of nights ago I woke up with cold feet--welcome to the North!--and eventually staggered out of bed to the closet to grab a pair of socks. I grabbed blindly, and heard a pair slide off the shelf onto the floor. {shrug--sigh--oh, well} When I got back to bed, they turned out to be the only pair of socks I own with toes. Did I stagger back to the closet? Nope. I sat there figuring out which foot matched which sock and slotted my toes in. And then I keeled over and went back to sleep. My clearest thought was the fear that I'd rip off my anklet when I toed off the socks later.

• Moral #1: Put the winter socks away. Better idea, in fact, is to put the CHRISTMAS winter socks away well before July. There are boxes in which the socks are supposed to live, but there are always socks stacked on top of the half-full boxes.
  
  
• Moral #2: Grope more carefully. The socks that fell (thinnish trouser socks) were better-suited to summer cold feet than the ones I returned to bed with.
  
  
• Moral #3: Rather than going to the closet...in fact, rather than getting out of bed at all...reach into the nightstand (top drawer, in front) and snag a pair of footies that I keep there for this very purpose! These would also have caused me no worries in the anklet-ripping-off department.
  
  
• Moral #4: Rather than going to the closet, turn off the overhead fan. Which the eye doctor told me not to have on at night. Which was the reason there was a chilly breeze blowing on my feet on an already-chilly night.

Mind you, I thought of NONE of these at 2 a.m. or even the next day. It was finding the trouser socks in the laundry basket yesterday that caused me to rethink my brain damage.