Friday, March 15, 2013


Just wrote a long email to a friend, which took forever to do because I burst into tears in the middle of it.

I really loathe winter, especially this dragged-out ending of the winter we're having this month, with every fiber of my being. Well, I would, if I weren't drugged up on anti-depressants to get me through it without mayhem.

Yes, those two thoughts are connected. I hadn't realized how miserable I've been for the past month, just day after day after day of slogging through, not wanting to get out of bed, not wanting to anything at home OR at work, having every bump in the road feel like Mt. Everest (or Mt. St. Helens), not crying because I am so good at distracting myself that I don't even realize how sad (and SAD) I am.

The faint silver lining of all of this is that at least I've got a reason, or a name, or whatever, for why I've felt like I'm faking my way through my days lately. Work has been especially bad: even the parts of my job that I love the most make me bone-weary; imagine how the yucky bits have been!? Plus, we are still short-staffed: six months of that is wearing on everyone at this point. At least we now have a director that isn't a time-vampire, and who has as great a sense of the absurd as the rest of the staff. YAY for that. Seriously, what a nice change!

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